“See, this is why you should never be a teacher.”
These were the words uttered by my parents every time the local news channel mentioned that public school teachers received pink slips with no guarantee of returning the following school year.
When I chose a career in elementary education, I knew that it was going to be an uphill battle. As a third-culture child, my career choice greatly influenced how others would see me. Like many other South Asian families, the expectation was to flourish in a more appropriate career path (i.e. engineering, medicine, etc.). I willingly chose not to adhere to those expectations, and ultimately, I had committed myself to a game of hide and seek.
I could not openly express that I wanted to be a teacher. After completing my undergrad, I was hired to work at a company in the financial district in San Francisco. This was not what I had originally planned, but I needed something to keep me busy and get me out of the house. I was tired of being compared to my peers who supposedly had jobs lined up for them right after graduation. Several months later, I left that job and enrolled in a teaching credential program without telling my parents. When I would leave in the morning and return home in the evening, it was assumed that I was going to work every day. I would attend my classes at San Jose State and spend hours at the library because my schedule was different every day, and it would look suspicious if I came home early.
It was normal for me to not talk about my day. I had been doing that for so long that it was now a habit. Furthermore, I completed my credential program when the economy had tanked and most districts were not hiring teachers. That only lowered my self-esteem, and I felt like a failure for not being able to get hired. I would desperately attend career fairs and stand in lines that were filled with teachers who had been pink slipped in March. Holding a stack of freshly printed resumes and letters of recommendation, I would reach the front of the line and the school district representatives would respond: “We are on a hiring freeze.” The only thought that crossed my mind was: “Then why have a career fair?”
I spent that school year subbing in various schools. It was not exactly what I had in mind, but it was better than doing nothing. I continued to submit my resume to different school districts and finally started giving interviews the following school year. My first job was at a local public charter school. At the time, I did not know how corrupt the school was, but I was desperate to gain any kind of experience. I was grateful to finally have my foot in the door!
Even after earning my credential and having my own classroom teaching 2nd grade, I still did not openly talk about becoming a teacher. I had become accustomed to not sharing anything that was happening in my life. It was easier to just not talk about it. Nonetheless, after several years of hiding what I was doing for a living, they figured it out. My W-2s came in the mail at home. It didn’t take long to connect the dots. Surprisingly, nothing was directly said to me. It was just accepted that I was now an elementary school teacher. There were no arguments of any kind, and I was not going to question it.
After almost six years of being in the classroom, there is a sense of security and stability. My family accepts what I do for a living. There are no complaints. Instead, I am asked whether I enjoy what I do or if I want to teach something different. I am grateful that my career choice is no longer seen as a problem, but just a different path. I could not have imagined this five or six years ago. After years of hiding my commitment towards teaching, I have finally found acceptance.
Shaina is currently teaching computers in Fremont, CA at Ardenwood Elementary School. She believes the CAPS LOCK key should be removed from keyboards. You can contact her at shaina.khan@gmail.com or visit her school website Ms. Khan's Computer Class.